Hard Time

And I'm stressed out. I'm tired of thinking about this little thing. And yeah, I do really got some pimples on my forehead.

So, my solution is, I have to keep my patience till it's LIMITLESS. So yeah, my patience is limitless. No limitation. I can keep my patience. But, yeah, I'm easily get PISSED. Don't test me.

I don't want to become a selfish person, hoping that my friends around me would try to take care of my fragile HEART, but, I would try to put it back instead. Sometime, I don't really want to think it all about me. (Like I usually do, I do realize that people never mind to think of me, yo)

You, People, please change. (I'm also telling this to myself)

  • You can't expect that every single person mind to care for you and stop telling you the things you don't wanna hear...,
  • Instead, you should listen to others, being HAPPY for others and thinking that someday that HAPPY moment of yours will finally arrive. But, not now. Someday, it will.
  • If you think that your problem is damn huge and it is totally upsetting you, PLEASE DO THINK AGAIN. I'm worse, you know. I would NEVER forget the times I got rejected from those people. Crying alone in the dark. Keeping problems that I swear that I would NEVER tell others. It hurts. It's been years, and it still hurts. I've been in those situation where people telling me STUPID (in study), UGLY (compared to other girl) and 'LEMBIK' (in sport). And it feels like those words are still new. I would NEVER forget those words, but at the very least, I try to stand and resist those words. I would try to let go those bad comment.
So, I'll try to learn to let go. There's something big that I have to achieve instead of crying over those little things. And, I finally learn something, friends hurt me, friends let me down, friends make me feel stupid, but yeah, friends are also the CURE.

p/s: Yes, I AM ALONE. I don't really have friends to stick with me. But, yeah, I really do have GOOD FRIENDS. True friends who stay by my side, though.

16 wishes

Hah. I won't forget this moment. It's not on my BIRTHDAY, but, it's for my BIRTHDAY (plus, the farewell party as well)

Haha. Covering my eyes using a tie, heh? (Credit: Lynn)

Yummy! (Credit: Lynn)

It's 7 February 2011. It's my BIRTHDAY, peeps! Haha. No biggie, lah. But, well I AM FINALLY 16. Idk why, but becoming SWEET SIXTEEN is like a best thing. Hilary Duff even sings a song called SWEET SIXTEEN. Even in few American movies, most of the girls planned their sixteenth birthday few years before they reached 16! It sounds as if being 16 is a sweet thing. And their party for their sixteenth birthday is always the BEST party, ever. Whoa. Well, it was super awesome anyway that I got an unexpected birthday celebration from my friends on my sixteenth birthday, lol.

Okay. So, my 16 wish list. I'm not desperate. But, I just wish my 16 wishes will someday be granted. Haha. So, HERE WE GO:

1. Straight A's for SPM

2. TESL. That's my 'PATH'.

3. Someday, I'll achieve my ambition, yeah.

4. I've been longing for my OWN laptop. No more mom's lappy. I want DELL. the PINK one.

5. New DRESS.

6. Supra Skytop? Or Nike Dunks (I saw this on is STEP UP 3)

7. Bungee Jumping, whoa! I saw this one in a Korean movie, and fell in love since then.

8. Dare myself to DANCE in some public places.

9. Meet B2ST, including HYUN SEUNG. And I wanna say "
당신을 좋아해요" (copy in Google Translate, lol) to Hyun Seung. Hahaha. And I wanna give him the SWEETEST smile, ask for AUTOGRAPH and show my (poor) dancing skill to him.

10. Meet Demi Lovato in person and tells her how beautiful she is and I love her no matter what. And now, I wanna listen to her new single. Where are you Demi?

11. Getting lotta SUBSCRIBERS in YouTube. I'll try to post more vids, ok?

12. Eat TIRAMISU. I heard this cake is a mix of cake and ICE CREAM. For real? Please, somebody get me a tiramisu!

13. Telling I LOVE YOU to ALL the people I love. (but, now, I can't, because of my EGO. Huh)

14. Travellin to those places like, Australia (I wanna enjoy some games), Italy (I heart pasta) and the MAIN one is Mecca.

15. Take any DANCING class. Uhm. HIP HOP., TANGO, maybe?

16. MY SIXTEENTH wish on my sixteen birthday is...........my biggest DREAM. And there's no way I'm telling you. Haha. I'm keeping this to myself.

okay. These are wishes. And I'll try to make it happen. I'll try. Okay? btw, Thanks for lotta BIRTHDAY wishes. I feel blessed. Hah. Zahir, yo, thx for STEP UP 3. haha. It's AWESOME, you know. Diera, Thx a lot for the little necklace with a GUITAR locket on it. It's cool, seriously! btw, both of you had brought me to those things that I LOVE, you know like, DANCING, GUITAR, MUSIC. Whoaa. It is connected. Hah.


Fana, Me.

Honestly, we don't call ourselves as BFF. Ego, maybe? Haha. But, heaven yeah, we're GOOD FRIENDS. We've been friends since we were like, 8 (or 9, perhaps), so right now we're 16. So, it's been MANY years that we've became friends. So, I guess you understand me if I'm being ANNOYING. And I truly understand you if you're being somebody that people around you don't like, but, honestly, I don't mind. Like, SERIOUSLY. You can be whoever you wanna be as long as it's you. So, after many YEARS, I managed to bring myself to feeling comfy being next to you no matter how you act. Haha.

So, I bet we've been keeping too MUCH memories including HAPPY, SAD, TEARS, LAUGH, HURT. And I know I'm being MEAN to you. I know. I made you feel HURT inside. And I know. And because of my IGNORANCE, you must have been feeling slightly hating me for how I acted. So, I AM TRULY SORRY. I know it's hurt, but, I don't know how to turn back time and change! I AM SORRY. Forgive me. Only then, I will forgive you as well. Haha.

So, this 7 Feb, you'll leave TMS and leaving me as well. You know what, right now, I feel as if I don't have REASON to go to school. Yeah my 1st REASON is to learn, of course. But, right now, with your absence, I'm feeling a bit EMPTY, you know. I have no idea to whom should I fold my problems to. (But, wait, till I've got a CRUSH, then, I'll have a reason to go to school, lol. haha. Just kidding, hey). Still, thanks to Shezat and Qu, I still have them as good friends. Hah.

And yeah, I'm wishing you good luck. I know it has been your dream to stay at hostel. So, I WANT you to get rid all those problems that make you STRESSED OUT. Be safe, be healthy, be happy. Catch your dream. Go study, but, don't push yourself too hard. Do anything that you LOVE.

Thank You for:
  • Being a huge part of my life
  • Praying for my success (I know you are. haha)
  • Willing to listen to any words that came outta my mouth
  • Never make me feel like an idiot
  • Solving my problems (I guess)
  • Helping me (haha)
  • Willing to go with the flow when I started to being too BOSSY (I'm sorry)
  • Last but not least, for being my friend.

p/s: I HEART you. A lot. (;

Fashion Victim

According to Versace, "When a woman alters her look too much from season to season, she becomes a fashion victim." (Source: Wikipedia)

Well, I'm not the type who is obsessed with my look and appearance or cared to much from season to season (as mentioned), but still, I want to consider myself and FASHION VICTIM. Yes, I think I am.

You see. Sometime, I'm wearing too much COLORS (especially PINK). And now, we have SHAWLS, yo. I know. People change.
As well as fashion or trends. Well, I'm usually look at what other girls wear, and then, I decided to put on that as well. I tended to follow to wear what those girls wear.Technically, I don't really have problems with SHAWLS and my current clothes. But, yeah, I think this kinda fashion is killing me. I don't feel comfy, but, I'm still putting them on me. :(

I don't wanna look like those kinda girls. You see. Girls, these days. Covering their hairs in the name of fashion. Ugh. I don't wanna be a part of them. So, I'm trying to cover myself as best as possible.

You know. Hijab is not a trend. It is a must. Uhm. Labuhkan your hijab. And I'm trying to do so. Peace.

p/s: Ada sorg blogger tu kata YUNA IS A FASHION VICTIM. I don't think so. She covers herself well. At least.